Monday, July 7, 2008
Loss of bookmarks @ 8:53 PM
I mourn for the loss of all my bookmarks: thinkgeek, Mathematics, Chemistry, Physics applets, kitten wallpapers, etc etc...

I laugh at myself for the loss of passion in doing my homework.

Why must the world work this way? Why do the humans make it work this way?

It's meant to be a good place, it is a good place. No more.

Disappointed.

Lies. Am I the one intricately weaving them? Or am I the one made to believe the lie weaver?

Time and again, you inflict those injuries of mental gore, and send them burning right in the flesh of my heart. Time and again, I put that damned trust on you, believing that what awaits me will be a better future. Time and again, I actually bother to think about you.

All this to realise it's a big lie of yours. Big fat juicy lie.

What do I get out of this big fat juicy lie? Nothing. Just the numbness I always get, only more. Just the tears I cried for you, only less. Just the pain and agony you have put me through, forever.

You send me worrying about you, day and night, and this is what you give me?

I am willing to give my time, love, concern for someone I love devotedly. But not you this time. Not anymore.